Rumors, slander and inappropriate characterizations may appear online, in the workplace and in court. Some rumors disappear on their own, while others spread. Whether you are being smeared to your face or behind your back, whether the accusations are made in court or in the newspapers, you must remain calm and know your rights. With patience and support from trustworthy people, your reputation and confidence can be restored over time.
Dealing with Rumors
Cheer up. If a colleague, friend, or loved one accuses you of something you didn’t do, it’s best to calmly address them directly. If the other person accuses you face to face, you can take a deep breath before speaking. If the other person accuses you in a text or voice message, you might as well wait until you calm down and regain your senses before replying.
Statement of fact. After you have calmed down, state the facts as succinctly as possible. If your accuser is willing to listen to you, this can save you a lot of trouble. If the other person is temporarily unwilling to listen to your explanation, you can find out what the problem is.
- Even if the other person still doesn’t believe you after you’ve finished talking, that’s okay. Remember, once he slowly digests and understands what you said, he may start to believe you.
Investigate the ins and outs. Find out where these words are coming from and why your accusers believe them. If he is unwilling or unable to tell you the source of the information, ask him who else you can talk to about it.
- If he refuses to help you, ask him to imagine what he thinks you should do in a situation where you were wronged. Ask him, “What can you tell me?”
- You may never be able to figure out what happened, and you have to accept the possibility. Give time to quell the rumors. Your investigation may only make them worse.
Ask for help. Tell a friend or trusted colleague that you are plagued by rumors and ask them to speak up for you. If you are well-connected, you may not need to stand up to refute the rumors yourself.
- If you know that the false accusation stems from an unintentional guess or misunderstanding and is not malicious, then ask the person involved to clarify it for you.
Be generous. Don’t forget, that although some words may sound like malicious slander, they are just a misunderstanding or deviation in understanding. Don’t get angry or seek revenge. How you behave under pressure often says more about your character than rumors.
- Don’t fight back with false accusations, as doing so will only undermine your integrity.
Repair relationships again. False accusations can have lasting negative consequences and can put a relationship into crisis. Communicate candidly and without judgment with family and friends, and if there are serious rifts in the relationship, you can also consult a professional. You can be proactive and invite that person you haven’t seen in a while out for a cup of coffee.
- If you want to meet new people, pick up a new hobby. Participating in volunteer activities, taking a course, and attending meet-and-greets can allow you to make new friends with similar interests.
Readjust yourself. Your self-esteem may take a hit after being falsely accused. You need to remind yourself of these facts: A truly healthy self-esteem is based on seeking truth from facts. The key is to take care of yourself, exercise, and eat right. Make your home comfortable and nice, and wear clothes you like.
- Repeating affirmations, such as “A lot of people care about me,” or “I’m proud of my accomplishments,” can help heal the hurt of false accusations.
Responding to Personnel Investigations
Cooperate. If you are undergoing a background check by a staff member, remember that it is the investigator’s responsibility, and sometimes the law, to investigate certain allegations. If you actively assist investigators, the allegations against your character will appear less credible.
Statement of fact. Give investigators a clear idea of what is true and what is fabricated. If you have evidence to support your claim, give it to them.
Ask questions. Collect as much information as possible. Ask the people involved what steps the investigation will involve, whether your work needs to be adjusted during this period, how you will know when the investigation is over, who will notify you, and when the issue will be resolved.
- If it involves some confidential information, you might as well ask: “What can you tell me about X?”
- Be sure to find out the name and contact information of the investigator.
- Finally, ask who you can talk to about the investigation.
Know your rights. Until the false accusation is cleared up, you have to argue it. Even if the false accusation turns out to be false, be prepared that you may lose opportunities for promotion, or even be suspended or fired. Remain calm and communicate proactively with your boss and anyone with whom you have authority to discuss the situation.
- Be aware that even if you are fired based on false or unproven accusations, you will not necessarily be protected by the law. Unless you sign a contract that stipulates a minimum period of employment, you are employed at will with the agency and they can fire you for any reason.
- If the contract states that an employee can only be fired if they commit a crime, or if you believe you have been discriminated against, you can sue the organization for unfair dismissal.
Respond to Written Charges
Know your rights. False accusations published in print or online are called “libelous writings,” while false accusations spread on television, radio, or talk are called “libelous statements.” If conditions permit, you can consult a lawyer. You can sue the person who spread the rumor for defamation if certain conditions are met.
- Not all false accusations are defamatory. The case may not qualify as defamation if you are not named, if your character is in public doubt if you make a statement that supports a false allegation, if you are a public figure, or if the other party is your former employer or other protected party conditions of sin.
Post an article refuting the false accusations. If it is safe for you to do so, disclosing another part of the story that is not known to the public may be able to defuse the situation or turn the situation around. Contact the journalists and publishers who reported the story and ask them to remove their coverage of the false accusations or publish your rebuttal.
- If the allegation is illegal, consult an attorney before making a public statement.
Wait for the rumors to die down on their own. The less you respond, the better. After consulting with an attorney or making a public statement, remember that you have done all you can do. If you continue to respond to every wave of slander, it is likely to fuel the rumors even more.
Post positive content. After the storm has passed, do an online search for your name and see what comes up. If the first results that pop up are mixed with these false accusations, you need to spend some time releasing some positive information online. Write some articles or film some videos on topics unrelated to the false accusations. Start a website, write about something you like, or update your professional resume.
- Share your updated positive content with friends and family to improve search results.